What was the last thing to go through a bug's mind before he hit the windshield?
His butt!
If tomorrow's prediction were true, which I'm certain it's not, and the world is not actually coming to an end. But if it were, I'm fairly certain I experienced the plague of locusts this morning while I was driving in my car.
I was getting off one highway onto another on my way to my aunt's house. I was bombarded by a swarm of something, which were probably locusts. I saw them coming and drove right through them and heard a succession of thump-thump-thump-thump-thump on my windshield. When I emerged from the swarm I was left with about 30 dead bug butt splats across my windshield. I did what anyone would do to remove bug splats. I fired off some windshield washer fluid and turned on my wipers, except no windshield washer fluid sprayed out, yet the wipers turned on. Do you know what I was left with? Bug butts smeared all over my windshield. It was disgusting.
The baby was screaming in the back seat and I couldn't get to my destination soon enough. Of course I was in the middle of no where and there wasn't an exit between me and my aunt's house that would have a gas station and/or windshield washer fluid at a corner bodega (note: there are no bodegas where we live). I was left with what looked like a mid-winter frost covered windshield except the defroster wouldn't have worked in this case. I had to forge ahead and drive about 10 miles that way. Stopping to dump the water bottle I had packed to drink for myself would've just pissed the baby off even more. And really? He was pissed off enough, don't ya think...
So, who knows what tomorrow will bring...but I have on my to do list to refill my windshield washer fluid reservoir and prepare for the remaining 9 plagues. Let me know if you see a lot of frogs, ok?
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